Your Personal Reality at Work: Insistence

Report Support - Article written by Torri Olanski

Insistence—one of the components that typically takes up a lot of room in the team dynamics discussion. And that’s because how we approach tasks and exert control are two big parts of our interactions at work. Due to the impact that Insistence—or lack thereof—has in the workplace, it’s important to be able to understand the personal reality that your clients and employees live in regarding the component Insistence.

Your personal reality encompasses the powerful dynamic that is created between your Usual Behavior and Need scores. The view you have of yourself and the world around you makes up the reality that you live in and is what you likely deem as a behavioral truth. We like it when our personal realities are not put into question, because then we can feel most productive and comfortable, as opposed to being triggered by those on our team. You’ll probably find that you fit into one of the following four personal realities regarding Insistence. Below is a short summary of each one to help you understand the realities that different personalities are living in at work.

The Insistent One

I am more insistent than others. I make this claim about myself because I like to be in control of the plan and how things are done, and I typically am. In my personal reality, I see myself as being much more systematic than others. Since I expect to be the insistent one, I feel triggered when others are rigid and controlling with me, especially if I get the sense that I am losing control of my plan. When my expectation that others will be flexible and less insistent than me is fulfilled, I am satisfied and comfortable because my personal reality—that I am the insistent one—holds true.

Examples of scores:

Pattern: Higher Usual, Lower Need

• 99 Usual, 29 Need
• 85 Usual, 16 Need
• 66 Usual, 7 Need

Insistent in an Insistent World

I am just as insistent as those around me; I like being in control of the plan as do others. My personal reality consists of a structured, do-it-the-right-way type of world. Since I expect the world to be a structured, consistent place, I feel triggered when others appear disorganized and too spontaneous, especially if I get the sense that there is no plan in place. When my expectation that others will be structured and detail-oriented is fulfilled, I am satisfied and comfortable because my personal reality—that the world is an insistent place—holds true.

Examples of scores:

Pattern: Higher Usual, Higher Need

• 99 Usual, 99 Need
• 85 Usual, 85 Need
• 76 Usual, 76 Need

Flexible in a flexible world

I am flexible just like other people. My personal reality consists of a spontaneous and adaptive world. Since I expect very broad guidelines, I feel triggered when others are rigid and controlling with me, especially if I get the sense that they are being overly insistent and emphatic with details. When my expectation that others will be flexible and free is fulfilled, I am satisfied and comfortable because my personal reality—that the world is free from insistence—holds true.

Examples of scores:

Pattern: Low Usual, Low Need

• 2 Usual, 2 Need
• 16 Usual, 16 Need
• 29 Usual, 29 Need

The Flexible one

I am more flexible than those around me. I make this claim about myself because I don’t have the desire to insist on a specific plan and how things are done in the same way that others do. In my personal reality, I see myself as being much more spontaneous and adaptive than others. Since I expect to be the flexible one, I feel triggered when others appear too flexible or disorganized when I interact with them, especially if I get the sense that there is no plan in place to follow. When my expectation that others will be more insistent and structured than me is fulfilled, I am satisfied and comfortable because my personal reality—that I am the flexible one—holds true.

Examples of scores:

Pattern: Lower Usual, Higher Need

• 7 Usual, 66 Need
• 29 Usual, 85 Need
• 42 Usual, 99 Need

By reviewing these four Insistence patterns, we’re able to get a glimpse into the very different behavioral truths that individuals live by in the workplace and how a working relationship may result in either conflict or harmony.

For example, when individuals with a personal reality of “Insistent in an Insistent World” and “Flexible in a Flexible World” are working together, they may fundamentally misunderstand each other. The behaviors of one another may initially cause conflict and confusion as they experience and approach work in such different ways. For these individuals, they must work to better explain each other’s viewpoints and how they can best work together.

In contrast, two people working together with the belief that I am “The Insistent One” and “The Flexible One” may find they work together quite well as they’re both able to play the roles that allow them to be most comfortable and productive. What each person should keep in mind is that there is a lot they can learn from the other person’s style, even though they likely see their way as the correct way.

Here are 3 suggestions for next steps:

1. Reflect on the different personal realities at work on your team. How do they impact the team’s dynamics? What can each individual learn from the other styles?
2. Learn more about the Insistence Component by checking out the Component video on Insistence here: https://youtu.be/8VrAYTmJxMM
3. Give this approach a try for some of the other Components if you liked interpreting the scores from the perspective of one’s personal reality.